Seinfelt: The Compound Interest →
seinfelt: Kramer sends himself back in time to 1860, bringing nothing but a penny. His plan is to deposit it in a bank account, bring himself back to the present, and get rich off a century and a half of compound interest. When he tries, however, the bank teller guffaws at his “hobo getup” and “funny money…
Seinfelt: The Rally →
seinfelt: Walking through Union Square, Kramer passes by a Neo-Nazi rally that has drawn hundreds of onlookers. A news crew asks for his opinion, and he says, “You know, what these people are advocating is despicable, but they do have a right to free speech. You gotta respect that.” George stumbles across a…
Seinfelt: The Sixth Sense →
seinfelt: George can’t find anyone willing to go to the movies with him, so he goes to see The Sixth Sense alone. He’s highly entertained, and the twist ending really sticks with him. When he tries leaving the theater, however, the automatic doors won’t open for him, no matter how vigorously he moves. He…
Seinfelt: The Laundry Scheme →
seinfelt: Kramer approaches Jerry, George, and Elaine with a brilliant idea: He’ll pick up the others’ laundry from their apartments, wash it, and return it to them for no cost other than the quarters needed to operate the machine. The tradeoff is that he gets to include one third of his laundry with each…
Seinfelt: The Fool →
seinfelt: Kramer decides to prank the others by using a harness to make it look as though he hanged himself in Jerry’s apartment. The prank backfires when the harness fails and Kramer actually dies. Anticipating such an April Fools stunt, the others go about their business, visiting with each other in the…
Seinfelt: The Unisexer →
seinfelt: Jerry notices that his Superman statuette seems to move to different places in his apartment whenever he looks away. Even stranger, its expression seems to be growing angrier. Elaine dates a man who wears only unisex “one size fits all” clothing, and insists she do the same. Though initially… How are these so good?
Tim Sells His Soul
crimesagainstpoetry: Tim took a walk down to Hell For his soul he wanted to sell The devil said, “Shucks, I’ll give ya three bucks if you throw in a blowjob as well.” And he did. by Colin
So I made a new loop for a thing!
Seinfelt: The Haircut →
seinfelt: Jerry gets an extremely short haircut, and is ridiculed by the others for having a “lumpy head.” George clucks at the superiority of his smooth dome. Seeking to take the heat off himself, Jerry rummages through Kramer’s belongings and finds a journal he’s been keeping. He starts to recite it to…
Possum joke/true story
There are possums in my wall and that would be ok but they keep slipping down and scratching being like OH FUCK OH FUCK and then hitting the ground and waking me up and im all like, get a grip.
So this one time I was alone and touching myself and then my entire family burst into my room and when they saw my ding dong they all immediately turned to porcelain and fell over and shattered all over my floor. The sound of the smash made me instantly ejaculate. I guess you could say I came from a broken family.
I’m sorry but if you reblog yourself you are automatically gay
This is my submission to this months Loop De Loop. The theme was Hollywood! Click here to go and vote for mine so I win.